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Little things in the motherhood journey may leave you feeling like a horrible mom. Some of them may seem insignificant to other people while to you, they are a real big deal. Bringing up healthy and wholesome little humans is an arduous task. To do it well, you’ll have to learn to let go of mom guilt.
Whether it’s the forgotten lunch box, having to leave your babies for recreational time or a work assignment, or the one time you shouted at the kids in a moment of frustration, mom guilt can leave you in tears and feeling like a failure. this article shares helpful tips to help you let go of mom guilt right now and stop shaming yourself.
What is Mom Guilt?
Mom guilt is a debilitating thought and attitude that you’re not doing enough for your kids. The need to do the best for your kids, and having to face your shortcomings can leave you totally drained and perpetually guilty.
While it’s common, it’s not right. Mom guilt has the potential to drain the joy out of your motherhood. In extreme cases, it may cause post-partum depression when you’re just feeling in over your head with all the motherhood duties.
The good thing is you’re not alone. Almost every mom will tell you of the many times they have struggled with mom guilt. It’s possible to be a mom and be guilt-free.
6 Simple Ways to Let Go of Mom Guilt
Letting go of mom guilt is a marathon, not a sprint. Here’s how you can let go of mom guilt and free yourself free from it.
#1 Lower the perfection standards
To let go of mom guilt, you need to relax the rules you have set for yourself and quit expecting to be perfect. Indeed, babies don’t come with a manual, but neither do new moms.
All the reading and preparation for a newborn do not prepare you for the real deal. When it’s happening, it’s like walking through the Villa Pisani labyrinth.
You see the understanding you give your kids and forgive their faults because they are learning? Well, mama, pour yourself a glass of understanding as well. Extend some kindness your way and cut yourself some slack. Everyone is learning and unlearning along the way. It’s okay to make a mistake and be less than perfect.
Also Read: What to Expect During Postpartum Recovery: 9 Common Problems and Solutions
#2 Know that no two moms or babies are alike
Mom guilt also comes from seeing how other moms are effortlessly hacking this mom thing while you’re barely staying afloat. Little perfect babies who burp perfectly and don’t spit mashed butternut all over their mom’s make-up can send you to the guilt chambers pretty fast.
Every mom experiences a bad day, there are no perfect kids, and there’s no ideal mommy. Kids are different and will achieve milestones at different stages. Babies differ in their temperaments, and your child’s bad day or mood does not reflect on your motherhood’s success. Let go of mom guilt and enjoy your motherhood journey and your baby with their uniqueness.
Related Article: 5 Creative Ways To Create Memories With Your Kids (For Free)
#3 Keep a schedule and a journal
If you’re asking, “How can I let go of mom guilt?” start by journaling. Putting down your thoughts helps put things into perspective. It also helps you narrow down what weighs you down the most.
A schedule helps you plan your activities and to remind you of the essential things. Forgetting the important things in your children’s lives is a major cause of mom guilt. Put them down to stay ahead of everything.
Related Article: 13 Baby Sleep Tips: How To Get Your Baby To Sleep Fast
#4 Accept it: Some sacrifices are worth it
It’s common for moms to feel guilty about leaving, especially when they don’t work from home. An important work trip may leave you feeling like the worst mom in the history of bad moms.
However, the children need food and a roof over their heads. And they will still be there when you get back.
If you have been on maternity leave and need to get back to work, prepare for this by pumping enough milk in advance to get everything the baby needs. If the milk supply is not enough, consider introducing formula to make sure he’s well-fed when you’re away.
Talk to older children and prepare them for your departure to reduce the tears that may make your mom guilt worse.
Related Article: How Do I Survive Going Back To Work After Maternity Leave? 9 Helpful Tips
#5 Have a network of moms for support
Having a mom’s network is a wonderful way to let go of mom guilt by sharing your struggles with motherhood with people who understand. There are very few issues that you will face as a mom that will only be unique to you.
Join a forum of moms online or offline to see how other moms are dealing with the issues that are always taking you on a mom guilt trip.
If there’s no network of moms that you know of, start one! Sharing your struggles helps mothers open up too, you’ll be amazed at how many moms need that.
#6 Log off social media for a while
Social media is great; it has made a positive impact in many ways. However, it’s also deceptive. However, be cautious about the pages that may paint a glamorous picture and make you feel worse. Some pages may be posting their motherhood journey to grow a following.
If social media is causing you to feel inadequate about your life and choices as a mother, give yourself a break and concentrate on the real life around you.
If, for some reason, such as work, you’re not able to entirely avoid it, sieve it only to read things that are beneficial to you. Reading mom blogs or following social media pages about mom struggles and solutions can also motivate you to deal with mom guilt.
FAQs
- How do I get rid of mum guilt?
The best way to let go of mom guilt is to show yourself some compassion and take it easy. Log off from social media if it is making you feel bad about yourself and surround yourself with
- Why do I feel like I don’t want to be a mom anymore?
It is normal to feel like you don’t want to be a mom anymore when you are exhausted or your baby cries all the time. If you suspect that you have postpartum blues get someone you trust to talk to or reach out to a professional to help you process the emotions.
- How do I stop regretting my motherhood?
If you are regretting motherhood it means you did not get what you expected or are feeling overwhelmed by the things you need to do. Accept help from your partner or friends and try relaxation techniques to manage stress.
- How do I get over my mom’s guilt of going back to work?
Most moms feel guilty when they have to leave their children to go back to work. To let go of mom guilt think about why need to go back to work and how it will help you provide the best life for your child.
- Is it normal to always feel like a bad mom?
Most mothers struggle with feeling like they are a bad mom. The truth is in your child’s eyes you are the best mom ever. So extend yourself some grace and stop chasing perfection.
Final Thoughts
Being a mom comes with so many joys that may be robbed of you if you concentrate on your failures – real and imagined. You have to make a deliberate effort to let go of mom guilt.
Learn to laugh at your mistakes, and forgive yourself a little often. Make more memories, even when things turn out differently from what you imagined. You can bet your kids think you’re terrific. This is why you need to let go of mom guilt right now.
Read Next:
- How To Plan Your Baby’s First Birthday
- 14 Parenting Hacks That Will Make Your Life Easier
- 9 Best Gift Ideas For A New Mom That She’ll Actually Use
- 9 Tips To Return To Work After Maternity Leave
